barefoot bob Posted January 27, 2007 Share Posted January 27, 2007 Maybe they were from Oildale too. i had a quite an experiance with bakersfield womwne when i did the brooks fiber project in town it involved a waitress on the top floor of the car parking stucture behind the string of bars downtown wher you go bar to bar through the alley. and her friends walking up on us but thats all the details i can give :monkeedance2: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richard Cheese Posted January 29, 2007 Author Share Posted January 29, 2007 i had a quite an experiance with bakersfield womwne when i did the brooks fiber project in town it involved a waitress on the top floor of the car parking stucture behind the string of bars downtown wher you go bar to bar through the alley. and her friends walking up on us but thats all the details i can give i know that parking garage pretty well. after a friday night of drinking, my buddy and I went to get my car, and we had to take a leak. Well, of course, boys will be boys, and we went off the side, into the alley. Then we heard, "What in the hell are you ARSEHoles doing? Get down here NOW." it was the EFFEN cops. They were cool about it, and let us go. good thing I only had 2 earlier on in the evening with dinner. scared the sh*t outta me Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duneraider Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 I was re-fueling the gas containers in Baker and two girls pulled up and asked if I knew of a bar in town? The traffic was stopped in both directions on the I 15. I sent them to the bar behind Dennys. I forget the name, but they said why don't you stop by for a few too? So I did - after a week in the dunes with the family, a drink at the bar sounded good. They were on their way to 'Vegas, and had boob jobs some time earlier, and this was their first trip out since their operations. They'd show anyone in the bar their NEW double blessings that wanted to look. Never saw the girls again, but the bartender thinks I have some sort of way with chix because of that one really hilarious episode. I don't have a special way with chix,,, I had just met them,, and they were having a blast holding court. It was a fun nite, everyone in the very packed bar was having an awesome time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barefoot bob Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 i know that parking garage pretty well. after a friday night of drinking, my buddy and I went to get my car, and we had to take a leak. Well, of course, boys will be boys, and we went off the side, into the alley. Then we heard, "What in the hell are you ARSEHoles doing? Get down here NOW." it was the EFFEN cops. They were cool about it, and let us go. good thing I only had 2 earlier on in the evening with dinner. scared the sh*t outta me mine was more ....welll........ hood of the car kinda situatiuon might i add i was single waaaayu before i was married Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
raptorgirl Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 Geez I knew there was a reason why I never really hung out down town. heh Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barefoot bob Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 all i can say is that lil section of town was rockin in 95 and 96 !!!! a single construction guys dream place to work and play !!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Richard Cheese Posted January 29, 2007 Author Share Posted January 29, 2007 all i can say is that lil section of town was rockin in 95 and 96 !!!! a single construction guys dream place to work and play !!! that's when I was bouncing at the alley cat.... every thursday, friday and sat nights from 94-97 I bet I ran into you there...you freekin lush anyway, it is all gangbangers there now, with a shooting happening every other week or so....since I have a family now, i do not go to the bars, as I have one in my backyard!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desertskyz Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 that's when I was bouncing at the alley cat.... every thursday, friday and sat nights from 94-97 I bet I ran into you there...you freekin lush anyway, it is all gangbangers there now, with a shooting happening every other week or so....since I have a family now, i do not go to the bars, as I have one in my backyard!! Me to! With games a firepit and everything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RAGDOLL MX Posted January 31, 2007 Share Posted January 31, 2007 i actually forgot about this one, when i was stationed at FT Benning, my buddy Dave and I had purchased a 21ft open bow Bayliner. We pulled it with our 74 F100 all the time, the truck look like a pile, but ran like hell. we never even washed it, if it got dirty we just painted over it with more Primer Grey paint, good as new! Well we took out the boat one day and it was acting up, so we got back to shore and i went up to my Ranger, to drive up to the main dock and get some gear oil. meanwhile Dave had driven the F100 with the trailer down to the boat dock to load the boat so we could put in the gear oil while it was on land. Dave being a bit lazy parked the trailer half in the water and half on land. tried to ease the boat on the trailer. Iam still at the store getting oil and returning with a quickness.... As I pulled down to the dock, i see that the dam boat is in the water still, thinking "Dammit Dave, why are you slackin?" well i take a look around and i dont see the truck there, but i do see alot of trash in the water, empty bottles, soda cans and things like that. then thats when i see this grey thing about 6 inches out of the water...I walk up to the dock and ask Dave... Cole:"What the hell is that?" Dave: laughing....now talking like Sean Connery from Hunt from Red October "um...Signal with one ping and one ping only" Cole: "is that our truck?" Dave: now laughing uncontrolably "yup" So now what dave had done, was moved only half of the trailer into the water, and tried to move the boat up to it, so he moved it several times to get the boat on the trailer, when he accidently knocked it into neutral, and well as Isac Newton had figured out, Gravity is a law not an option. So with gravity in full effect, the truck slowly rolled back and into the lake where our boat was still adrift. I ended up getting my ranger hooked up to the water logged F100 and attempting to drag it from the depths of the lake. well a 4 cyl truck, cant quite do it. so then we hooked up a Jeep Cherokee and drug up our amphibious Ford. Just like in the movies, we opened the door and about 200 gallons of water and even a fish came out of the cab of the truck. We let the truck sit there over night while we rounded up the stuff needed to replace all the fluids in our truck, we put some new gas in it and it fired right up, so we got in our soggy seated beater and off we went back to FT Benning. the truck never ran that good in its life. After we got back to work we gave it a new coat of primer grey and i also added some new Naval White numbers to the front of the truck, and aptly named the truck the "S.S. Minnow" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dunefreak Posted January 31, 2007 Share Posted January 31, 2007 Thats some funny chit right there^^^ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danielle Posted January 31, 2007 Share Posted January 31, 2007 Ok! here is one for you guy's.Last labor day we go to Bryce Canyon to go riding.We arrive late at night.Next morning after eating etc.we decide to all get ready to go ride, and a storm comes in windy,cold and raining.So all five of us are stuck in that small trailer we had for hours and the kids are ready to kill eachother.So my husband and I decided to go mudd riding,of course the kids didn't want to go cause it was cold...So we put on every pull over we had with us and anything else warm.Had a blast,covered in every part of our body in mud and probally all the animal poop in the area,couldnt even see out our goggles,hands were frozen.It must have been 40 degrees.So we go back to camp and couldn't go in the trailer so I tell my daughter to put a bag together for her father and 1 for me as we were going to take showers in the campsite showers. Now there is the men's side and women's on complete other sides of the building.It is one big bathroom with 8 stalls for the showers.So I am now done with the nice hot shower and can feel my face,fingers,and toes again.Go to dry off and guess what.NO TOWEL....Didn't know what to do and than I start thinking maybe my husband has both of them,well isnt he warm and toasty,and if not ,what is running through his mind right now.Now I am standing in the shower not knowing what to do dripping wet,don't want to be cold again and could not stop laughing.In between my laughing i keep hearing the door open and close to the bathroom so now I am trying to hold my laugh back so people dont think there is some crazy person laughing by herself.So now I am snorting from holding my laugh in.I must of sounded really disturbed.Well I figured I better get out of there so I found the only dry clean section of my muddy clothes to wipe off the drips.Leave the bathroom thank god nobody was in there cause I am still laughing,laughed all the way back to camp and yes it was windy still but no rain at that point.There I see my husband peek his head around the trailer laughing his a$$ off and no he had no towel either.So he had to tell me he was standing in the shower b*** naked with his flip flops on in disbelief.So now I am laughing even harder and my daughter comes out of the trailer all defensive thinking I was mad at her (with an attitude I cant do everything,watching the boys etc...) It was to funny to be mad.And to this day she still gets defensive if the story is told.And that trip didn't end there.My husband wrote a 3 page story on that one trip to go into the photo album with the pics .With that 1 story 2 more followed on that vacation.Never a dull moment with the CIRCUS FARKAS FAMILY... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RAGDOLL MX Posted March 7, 2007 Share Posted March 7, 2007 (edited) ill resurect this for a bit. i remember when i was a young kid of about 10 or 11 years old, and I was living in Maryland with my mom and dad. and it was a cold april day, the first to be exact. and i looooovvvveee to play tricks, well my mom and i were on our way to go to town (it was about 30 miles away, we lived out in the country) and we were going to rent some movies...Beta's to be exact. and i had this bright idea to tell my mom that she had a spider on her back, knowing that she is deathly afraid of spiders...and I watch in amazement as my mother turned into a violent tornado of a contorionist, attempting to free herself of the "Spider" that has just invaded her space. As i lay on the floor paralized in laughter, she realizes that between the laughter and the snorts that iam trying to say april fools. well my mother not as amused as myself and my dad, my mom just looks at me and tells me...."Ill get you back you lil sh*t". Iam Thinking ...no wayyyyy youll get me back, ill be prepared. well on our way to town, our driveway is 1700 ft long, and it has a HUGE dip in it, it basicly goes about 300 feet straight and then it goes down like a roller coaster into the grand canyon, and then back up. so our 78 ford fairmont can attain speeds of up to 60 or 70 MPH with out even trying. Well we got to town got our ever so newly released Beta VHS tape, and on our way back. The big thing for a 11 yr old kid at that time was to haul arse down that hill and hit the negative G's, so on our way into our driveway, i look at mom and say...."GO MOM GO!!!", well she does...this has got to be the fastest we have ever gone, right before the plunge i look over and i see that the speedo says 60!!!! WOW MOM IS COOOOL!..(yeah right)...well the speed picks up even more as we hit the bottom of the hill, and on the way up my mother screams out "COLBY WE GOT NO BRAKES!!!!!"...as she is stomping the floorboard with her feet....(I was convinced) It didnt take a brain surgeon to realize that i have seen this in the movies, Iam not the captian of the ship, so iam not going down with it either! as those words exited my moms mouth, i had already un buckled my seat belt and opened the door! i was about to jump ship at 70 plus miles an hour!!!! the door was half way opened and i was preparing to bail, when i heard her laughing.....(iam thinking...this crazy b*tch thinks its funny that were gonna die!)..I suddenly feel her hand on the back of my Tuffskin jeans, and the car suddenly slow...(now iam thinking...Devine Intervention...cause God himself sees how crazy this lady is and dosent want her this soon) My mom got me back into the car, and it came to a stop, she is laughing so hard my dad comes running down the driveway to see what all the noise is about, my dad takes one look at my mother IN TEARS, snorting and laughing, and takes one good look at me......WHITE AS A GHOST! and starts laughing... Well i can tell you this much.......iam 34 now....and i was about 11 then...i have never played a april fools joke on my mother since...nor will I...(at least while she is still walking..ill wait till she is in the walker) Edited March 7, 2007 by RAGDOLL MX Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs. Dooner Posted March 7, 2007 Share Posted March 7, 2007 ill resurect this for a bit. i remember when i was a young kid of about 10 or 11 years old, and I was living in Maryland with my mom and dad. and it was a cold april day, the first to be exact. and i looooovvvveee to play tricks, well my mom and i were on our way to go to town (it was about 30 miles away, we lived out in the country) and we were going to rent some movies...Beta's to be exact. and i had this bright idea to tell my mom that she had a spider on her back, knowing that she is deathly afraid of spiders...and I watch in amazement as my mother turned into a violent tornado of a contorionist, attempting to free herself of the "Spider" that has just invaded her space. As i lay on the floor paralized in laughter, she realizes that between the laughter and the snorts that iam trying to say april fools. well my mother not as amused as myself and my dad, my mom just looks at me and tells me...."Ill get you back you lil sh*t". Iam Thinking ...no wayyyyy youll get me back, ill be prepared. well on our way to town, our driveway is 1700 ft long, and it has a HUGE dip in it, it basicly goes about 300 feet straight and then it goes down like a roller coaster into the grand canyon, and then back up. so our 78 ford fairmont can attain speeds of up to 60 or 70 MPH with out even trying. Well we got to town got our ever so newly released Beta VHS tape, and on our way back. The big thing for a 11 yr old kid at that time was to haul arse down that hill and hit the negative G's, so on our way into our driveway, i look at mom and say...."GO MOM GO!!!", well she does...this has got to be the fastest we have ever gone, right before the plunge i look over and i see that the speedo says 60!!!! WOW MOM IS COOOOL!..(yeah right)...well the speed picks up even more as we hit the bottom of the hill, and on the way up my mother screams out "COLBY WE GOT NO BRAKES!!!!!"...as she is stomping the floorboard with her feet....(I was convinced) It didnt take a brain surgeon to realize that i have seen this in the movies, Iam not the captian of the ship, so iam not going down with it either! as those words exited my moms mouth, i had already un buckled my seat belt and opened the door! i was about to jump ship at 70 plus miles an hour!!!! the door was half way opened and i was preparing to bail, when i heard her laughing.....(iam thinking...this crazy b*tch thinks its funny that were gonna die!)..I suddenly feel her hand on the back of my Tuffskin jeans, and the car suddenly slow...(now iam thinking...Devine Intervention...cause God himself sees how crazy this lady is and dosent want her this soon) My mom got me back into the car, and it came to a stop, she is laughing so hard my dad comes running down the driveway to see what all the noise is about, my dad takes one look at my mother IN TEARS, snorting and laughing, and takes one good look at me......WHITE AS A GHOST! and starts laughing... Well i can tell you this much.......iam 34 now....and i was about 11 then...i have never played a april fools joke on my mother since...nor will I...(at least while she is still walking..ill wait till she is in the walker) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RAGDOLL MX Posted March 7, 2007 Share Posted March 7, 2007 iam glad someone got a laugh out of it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Foxysandchick Posted March 7, 2007 Share Posted March 7, 2007 iam glad someone got a laugh out of it :no_no: You are going to get me in trouble I am working and trying so hard not to laugh! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
raptorgirl Posted March 8, 2007 Share Posted March 8, 2007 You had me cracking up, that was great. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
offroadracer Posted March 8, 2007 Share Posted March 8, 2007 ill resurect this for a bit. i remember when i was a young kid of about 10 or 11 years old, and I was living in Maryland with my mom and dad. and it was a cold april day, the first to be exact. and i looooovvvveee to play tricks, well my mom and i were on our way to go to town (it was about 30 miles away, we lived out in the country) and we were going to rent some movies...Beta's to be exact. and i had this bright idea to tell my mom that she had a spider on her back, knowing that she is deathly afraid of spiders...and I watch in amazement as my mother turned into a violent tornado of a contorionist, attempting to free herself of the "Spider" that has just invaded her space. As i lay on the floor paralized in laughter, she realizes that between the laughter and the snorts that iam trying to say april fools. well my mother not as amused as myself and my dad, my mom just looks at me and tells me...."Ill get you back you lil sh*t". Iam Thinking ...no wayyyyy youll get me back, ill be prepared. well on our way to town, our driveway is 1700 ft long, and it has a HUGE dip in it, it basicly goes about 300 feet straight and then it goes down like a roller coaster into the grand canyon, and then back up. so our 78 ford fairmont can attain speeds of up to 60 or 70 MPH with out even trying. Well we got to town got our ever so newly released Beta VHS tape, and on our way back. The big thing for a 11 yr old kid at that time was to haul arse down that hill and hit the negative G's, so on our way into our driveway, i look at mom and say...."GO MOM GO!!!", well she does...this has got to be the fastest we have ever gone, right before the plunge i look over and i see that the speedo says 60!!!! WOW MOM IS COOOOL!..(yeah right)...well the speed picks up even more as we hit the bottom of the hill, and on the way up my mother screams out "COLBY WE GOT NO BRAKES!!!!!"...as she is stomping the floorboard with her feet....(I was convinced) It didnt take a brain surgeon to realize that i have seen this in the movies, Iam not the captian of the ship, so iam not going down with it either! as those words exited my moms mouth, i had already un buckled my seat belt and opened the door! i was about to jump ship at 70 plus miles an hour!!!! the door was half way opened and i was preparing to bail, when i heard her laughing.....(iam thinking...this crazy b*tch thinks its funny that were gonna die!)..I suddenly feel her hand on the back of my Tuffskin jeans, and the car suddenly slow...(now iam thinking...Devine Intervention...cause God himself sees how crazy this lady is and dosent want her this soon) My mom got me back into the car, and it came to a stop, she is laughing so hard my dad comes running down the driveway to see what all the noise is about, my dad takes one look at my mother IN TEARS, snorting and laughing, and takes one good look at me......WHITE AS A GHOST! and starts laughing... Well i can tell you this much.......iam 34 now....and i was about 11 then...i have never played a april fools joke on my mother since...nor will I...(at least while she is still walking..ill wait till she is in the walker) that is funny :freakin_nuts: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RAGDOLL MX Posted March 8, 2007 Share Posted March 8, 2007 yeah it was, my mom still laughs her arse off to this day about it... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danielle Posted March 8, 2007 Share Posted March 8, 2007 yeah it was, my mom still laughs her arse off to this day about it... I my god Cole 2 nights in a row laughing like that I don't know if my stomach can handle it.I was just laughing so hard reading it that Chris was in the house and came running out to the office cause he thought something was wrong with me. :freakin_nuts: Our family is BIG april foolse prankster's,Oh and Halloween that is hubby's favorite holiday,he does some cruel jokes to the kid's on that day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RAGDOLL MX Posted March 8, 2007 Share Posted March 8, 2007 Dani, speaking of Halloween..here is another one for ya. Being that iam pior military, and i was stationed in Ft Benning Ga, home of the infantry, and my roomate was a scout sniper, and i have the privlidge of having handy dandy equipment at my disposal. one of those things that i was able to get was a ghillie suit, and i was able to mask it to my natural surroundings, and hid out in the front yard awaiting my prey......anyone who came by....it was also halloween too...so needless to say i was able to test my ghillie suit on all the un suspecting kids in the neighborhood...at the end of the night...i got more candy than i gave out... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luvdunes Posted March 8, 2007 Share Posted March 8, 2007 A few summers ago all of us went to Lake Perris for the day, my oldest son brought his boat out there. We all got in and went for a little ride when all of a sudden we saw some smoke comming out of the engine area. My Daughter-in-law starts throwing life jackets at everyone and is ready to jump overboard before we even stop. We stopped checked it out found out what was wrong and fixed it and decided to head back to the island and packed up to head home. Well, we are all in the boat and heading toward the lauch area and my son says the steering is getting harder and he keeps turning the steering wheel when all of a sudden the steering wheel comes off in his hands. I started laughing and could not stop, he was so pissed and kept telling me "it's not funny Mom we are stuck out here"! We got the oar out and started paddling and got near the marina and one of those little metal rental boats comes out and tows us to the dock at about 2 miles an hour. We were afraid the little boat was going to sink the bow was way up in the air. Needless to say the boat went right into the shop. He still doesn't think it is funny but the rest of us do, we laugh about it all the time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grimace Posted March 8, 2007 Share Posted March 8, 2007 I saw a good but very goofy friend of mine wreck 2 trucks in one day before 9:00am just trying to get to Silverwood Lake to ride and gave everyone a GREAT. This dude is definitly a couple bricks short but funny as oh hell. We were tryin to goto the lake in the morning and he was tryin to hook up his sea-doo trailer to his truck but decided to roll it down the driveway w/o help BAMM into his roommates truck #1. #2 We get to his bros house where he pulled into the driveway w/ the trailer attached. Got his bro and started to leave BAMM he T-Bone his own truck tryin to back out . #3 We finally got to the lake, I put my sea-doo in the water and parked to come back and see ALL the park rangers just at something. I look and sure enough it was my goofy buddy sideways on the launch ramp. He could NOT drive backwards straight at all. So after watchin in unbelief for a minute I had to rescue poor goofy from humileation. Wow this was all before 9:00am. To this day I still hangout with him because you never know whats next. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danielle Posted March 8, 2007 Share Posted March 8, 2007 Dani, speaking of Halloween..here is another one for ya. Being that iam pior military, and i was stationed in Ft Benning Ga, home of the infantry, and my roomate was a scout sniper, and i have the privlidge of having handy dandy equipment at my disposal. one of those things that i was able to get was a ghillie suit, and i was able to mask it to my natural surroundings, and hid out in the front yard awaiting my prey......anyone who came by....it was also halloween too...so needless to say i was able to test my ghillie suit on all the un suspecting kids in the neighborhood...at the end of the night...i got more candy than i gave out... That is cruel but funny,that sounds like something chris would do.He loves freaking his own kids out,but now they have all caught on to him and try to act like there to smart for him . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RAGDOLL MX Posted March 8, 2007 Share Posted March 8, 2007 I saw a good but very goofy friend of mine wreck 2 trucks in one day before 9:00am just trying to get to Silverwood Lake to ride and gave everyone a GREAT. This dude is definitly a couple bricks short but funny as oh hell. We were tryin to goto the lake in the morning and he was tryin to hook up his sea-doo trailer to his truck but decided to roll it down the driveway w/o help BAMM into his roommates truck #1. #2 We get to his bros house where he pulled into the driveway w/ the trailer attached. Got his bro and started to leave BAMM he T-Bone his own truck tryin to back out . #3 We finally got to the lake, I put my sea-doo in the water and parked to come back and see ALL the park rangers just at something. I look and sure enough it was my goofy buddy sideways on the launch ramp. He could NOT drive backwards straight at all. So after watchin in unbelief for a minute I had to rescue poor goofy from humileation. Wow this was all before 9:00am. To this day I still hangout with him because you never know whats next. i got a few friends like that.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs. Dooner Posted March 8, 2007 Share Posted March 8, 2007 iam glad someone got a laugh out of it sorry, just the way you explained it came off really funny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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