dinicolady Posted May 5, 2007 Share Posted May 5, 2007 Kell, I love ya, but I HATE that argument!!! :disco-dance: I am not missing out on anything by not having babies. In fact, I am gaining way more! Anything you get to love fills a place in your heart, but there is not a special "baby love bubble" that is hidden until you pop one out. I completely agree with you Anna! You may not think of yourself as a "mommy figure", but you have a nurturing soul! Look at all the critters you care for and I betcha you love 'em all! Legs, feet or fins, they all have a place in your heart or you'd be working at the library, or a car dealership :disco-dance: That "baby love bubble" still has me :disco-dance: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dinicolady Posted May 5, 2007 Share Posted May 5, 2007 (edited) I struggle with that everytime I read or hear about folks not wanting kids, but it's their choice even if I don't understand. I have to respect that..... Yes, exactly, I also respect that choice without completely understanding it!! Kids will change you forever and teach you some things you thought you'd never have to experience. I wouldn't be the person I am today if it wasn't for the experiences I've had in my life....and having a child is a big part of that. I wouldn't change a thing. I'll to that! The love, the fear, the happiness, the anxiety....the list goes on! If you are thinking about having kids, my advise is to make sure you are ready, financially, physically, & mentally. But once you have a kid and it's all said and done, you'll be happy you did. I'll never forget the advice given to Davey and I: "If you wait to have kids until you can afford them, then you'll never have them." On a serious note tho, it's really sad seeing so many babies giving birth to babies these days. It's better to NOT WANT & NOT HAVE than to HAVE & NOT WANT. It's an old arguement. It comes down to your choice your life. If you might ever get the urge, barrow one. Seen TOO much of that, children don't get to pick their parents. (Sometimes it makes ya consider mandatory sterilization.) But, that's why we live in America, because we DO have the right to CHOOSE!! Edited May 5, 2007 by dinicolady Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barefoot bob Posted May 5, 2007 Share Posted May 5, 2007 bla bla bbla blikity bla i was like dunie monkey for quite a while. i now have 3 kids .i didnt have my first child born to me untill i was 35. i fought f__ked and played all through my 20s . while my friends made babies and tied themselves down. most now are divorced having mid life crises problems or are full blown members of the welfare system i have toys children and am having the best time of my life . i wouldnt trade my kids for nothing. or my marrige for some dumb a$$ trist that ruins lives. it comes down to age god lets you know when your ready for those of you who survived the uphill climb having babies young and survived and still married you deserve a medal !!!!!! i am not knocking you parents who had problems cause our society pounded us to marry and have kids right away and now you have had a tough climb.You also deserve a medal if you stuck it through for the love of your babies . and a big fat one of these for you "studs" that hit it and quit it and dont support your chidren your a lower life form . Those of you who at least help support and see your kids even though your not together .. in my book life does twist us all . i strongly believe that most folks ( not all ) should wait till there older to take that kind of responsability marriage, and kids cause niether should be a burden , load or a drag on your life. you should love it so much that its no effort really. it takes work but when you love them more than your own life that work doesnt seem so hard. so live, love ,and enjoy the only life god gave you.................................. these are only my humble opinion. not law or gospel .just my honest opinion i had a deadbeat piece of crap low life father. so i feel i can say my thoughts on the deadbeat dad issue there is no excuse for it EVER !!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~JILL~ Posted May 8, 2007 Share Posted May 8, 2007 (edited) bla bla bbla blikity bla i was like dunie monkey for quite a while. i now have 3 kids .i didnt have my first child born to me untill i was 35. i fought f__ked and played all through my 20s . while my friends made babies and tied themselves down. most now are divorced having mid life crises problems or are full blown members of the welfare system i have toys children and am having the best time of my life . i wouldnt trade my kids for nothing. or my marrige for some dumb a$$ trist that ruins lives. it comes down to age god lets you know when your ready for those of you who survived the uphill climb having babies young and survived and still married you deserve a medal !!!!!! i am not knocking you parents who had problems cause our society pounded us to marry and have kids right away and now you have had a tough climb.You also deserve a medal if you stuck it through for the love of your babies . and a big fat one of these for you "studs" that hit it and quit it and dont support your chidren your a lower life form . Those of you who at least help support and see your kids even though your not together .. in my book life does twist us all . i strongly believe that most folks ( not all ) should wait till there older to take that kind of responsability marriage, and kids cause niether should be a burden , load or a drag on your life. you should love it so much that its no effort really. it takes work but when you love them more than your own life that work doesnt seem so hard. so live, love ,and enjoy the only life god gave you.................................. these are only my humble opinion. not law or gospel .just my honest opinion i had a deadbeat piece of crap low life father. so i feel i can say my thoughts on the deadbeat dad issue there is no excuse for it EVER !!!!!! I had a dead beat ex. Got divorced, $100.00 a month child support, Not much? It's been 23 years now and yet to see a $100 let alone a 100 a month for 18 years. I did it alone for 10 years, of course I was a lucky one and had a little help from my mom and sister, they helped as babysitters and a little emotional support etc. I waited till I was 28 to have mine and it was still hard. Edited May 8, 2007 by BALL-N-CHAIN Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sand chick Posted May 8, 2007 Share Posted May 8, 2007 I had a dead beat ex. Got divorced, $100.00 a month child support, Not much? It's been 23 years now and yet to see a $100 let alone a 100 a month for 18 years. I did it alone for 10 years, of course I was a lucky one and had a little help from my mom and sister, they helped as babysitters and a little emotional support etc. I waited till I was 28 to have mine and it was still hard. Same here. Although I didn't wait to have mine . As I said before I would not give him up for anything. I never understood those people who stood in the welfare line using "Single Mom" as an excuse :angry22: I was just under 20 when I had my son. Stayed with his dad for bout 3 months after he was born, til he busted my nose with a phone receiver. SEE YA!!! My mom didn't raise a complete fool. I worked three jobs so that I could put food on my son's table. Some days I went without eating. I had friends that milked the welfare system and called the first of every months "Mothers Day" :freakin_nuts: and went out and bought themselves new clothes, their rent was pd for by the state. I must admit back then I sometimes got a little jealous that they got to spend so much time with thier children, while I missed out. Sometimes I wonder if I did the right thing by keeping my own head above water and miss out on so much of his childhood. Then I look those girls today and they are still in the system and have miserable lives and they are now the jealous ones of what I have worked so hard for. I also look at my well grounded son and KNOW I did it right. And I must thank Sandbob for helping me to reach my goals, because he took on SOMEONE else's child when he didn't have to! Now my son's father is seeing how life was like for me for 15 years. When he calls to complain I remind him of that and then send a check in my son's name! But it's a good thing we can talk NOW. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
superdave Posted May 8, 2007 Share Posted May 8, 2007 I have a wonderful 2 year old daughter with my wife of almost 10 ten years and I wouldn't change a thing. I truely believe that if a woman has a mellow pregnancy, then the kid will be mellow also. My wife had a very mellow time and my kid is just awesome! She hangs out and chills anywhere, she is not a crabby baby, nor is she a whiner. She rides in my rail like a champ and she wants to go "up, down" all the hills, especially the tallest ones she can see. Her first camping trip was an overnight trip to the beach when she was 11 days old... :freakin_nuts: She calls my rail the "Up, Down car"..... :freakin_nuts: My wife and I are mellow people and we just like to hang out and have a good time, and that's hiow my daughter is. If you are thinking about having kids, my advise is to make sure you are ready, financially, physically, & mentally. But once you have a kid and it's all said and done, you'll be happy you did. My wife and I waited until we were 34 and 32 respectively andI think that had a lot do to with it also. Just my ya things will change when the hormones kick in later. my daughtwer was great too when she was 2 just like my 2 year old grandaughter is now. there is no formula for kids. you do the best you can but its a crap shoot. anything can happen. and believe me you can drive yourself nuts trying to figure them out or wondering where you could have screwed up. thank god for budweiser and good friends like all the ddr peeps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SandBox_Kid Posted May 8, 2007 Share Posted May 8, 2007 ya things will change when the hormones kick in later. my daughtwer was great too when she was 2 just like my 2 year old grandaughter is now. there is no formula for kids. you do the best you can but its a crap shoot. anything can happen. and believe me you can drive yourself nuts trying to figure them out or wondering where you could have screwed up. thank god for budweiser and good friends like all the ddr peeps. Amen to that brother!!! That's hitting the nail on the head. :freakin_nuts: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duniemonkie Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 hey dunie i wasn't singleing any one person out i was just giving my two cents on what i've seen and experienced No, I didn't think you singled me out. I just get that remark all the time and I take it as "I know better than you, you're just young and hard headed". But it probably does happen a lot that people say one thing then do another. I am sure that if I ended up raising a rugrat I'd be all "it's the greatest thing ever!". Luckily I won't have to end up like that (insert pic of scissors here)! I never said that one wouldn't be a great person with or without kids. Once you have a child in your life you would understand why I don't understand. Ger, I was saying you have to look at it both ways. People who are in the other situation think they have it good too. I am glad you are so into your kids and eventually your grandkids. It just sounded like you were saying that w/o kids there is no personal growth. It's all good. I completely agree with you Anna! You may not think of yourself as a "mommy figure", but you have a nurturing soul! Look at all the critters you care for and I betcha you love 'em all! Legs, feet or fins, they all have a place in your heart or you'd be working at the library, or a car dealership :ahhhhh: That "baby love bubble" still has me You crack me up lady! And I only love 'em till they bite me or try to hump me Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fmflover Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 My opinion to each their own, if you don't want kids so be it who cares there are plenty of other people having them, for me I think having kids would be awesome and looking forward to it whenever it may happen, and for the people who don't that just means you'll be the best aunt and uncles ever! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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