RAGDOLL MX Posted November 19, 2007 Share Posted November 19, 2007 (edited) Your pregame starts at 9, you go out at midnight, you go to after-hour clubs at 4, and you go home at 9 am. Sleep, Repeat. You don’t know what a last call is. You don't pay for clubs. You say "Hella" and "F**k" and say them often! Balllinnnnn. You have friends who are strippers, and know they prefer to be called “dancers” You got your first fake ID when you were 15 You don't pay a State Tax, thanks for coming You don't wear "Las Vegas", T-shirts. Only people from Cali would do that. You can get anything at any time…even a steak at 4 am. 24/7 b*tches When you go to different cities, you're amazed things aren't open after 9 pm You valet everywhere, you b*tch about parking in every other city…and you don’t use cabs You've never HAD to pay for parking. Oh, and parallel parking...what's that? When it rains people freak out & when it snows, they lose their minds. In the summer, your car is overheated...before you started driving… and winters are sub-zero. That's the way it is in a desert. You don't own an umbrella. You know that prostitution is illegal in Las Vegas. You have a smoking section in your supermarket. More of your friends were born in California than Nevada. You know a yellow light means there is plenty of time and a red light means there is still enough time. You always wait at a green light for the 3rd car to run the red light. Your the 3rd car running a red light. Your mayor used to work for the mob and still hangs out with show girls. The slot machines in the airport drown out the PA announcements Growing up here...you realize it's actually a "small city". You know how to get to any casino on the strip without taking Las Vegas Blvd. You are still asked "smoking or non?" when you go to out to eat You give directions to your house based on location of closest casino You need to walk through a casino to see a movie. You learned how to use crayon's by playing KENO at restaurants when you were a kid. drinking and driving is sometimes ok if you're just buzzed.....eeek You have seen your friends on "Vegas Cops" either working in the jail or getting arrested. You remember having a party in the desert where a casino now stands. In a town thats only 40 miles across, it only takes 2 hours to go from one side to the other. Only locals know a place called Hendertucky. When it hits 60 degrees its cold. Mondays are some peoples Fridays, and Tuesdays are some peoples Thursdays. You always know someone who works in a casino..."i went to school with......" You probably went to school with your arresting officer, and their cousin works in a casino, and their kid does valet. A cocktail waitress with no degree makes about 130K a year. 1 call.....thats all.... When you tell someone in Henderucky that you live on 95N and Durango they think you live in Reno. You have a "Vegas Themed Tattoo" ::::::::::::::edited::::::::::and added::::::::: The last time you went to the strip, your cousins were in town last summer You can now predict where the construction signs will be misleadingly placed. The state flower is the "Orange Caution Cone" You can get hard liquor any day of the week, any time of the day. When arriving home from vacation the slot machines in McCarran are comforting. You can spot a tourist from 3 miles away You laugh at people taking pictures in front of the "welcome" sign. You remember when the 215 was a secret. When at least one of the people in your neighborhood is a stripper if you can add any, then add some....i added about 10... Edited November 20, 2007 by RAGDOLL MX Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dunefreak Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 Your mayor used to work for the mob and still hangs out with show girls. And is a GIN lover who is the main spokesperson for Bombay Gin! A cocktail waitress with no degree makes about 130K a year. no kidding! 1 call.....thats all.... Call 8,7,7, 1, 5, oh, oh Those are good, Cole. So true too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RAGDOLL MX Posted November 20, 2007 Author Share Posted November 20, 2007 when your mayor is asked what he would take on a desserted island by a 3rd grader and he tells them...."Gin" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DuneJNKY Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 Sad that most of those fit Why you Gotta Knock on the Vegas Themed Tats??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vegas FX400 Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 Hella.....................yep, thats me Or, when it used to be safe to go to Lorenzi Park Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RAGDOLL MX Posted November 20, 2007 Author Share Posted November 20, 2007 Sad that most of those fit Why you Gotta Knock on the Vegas Themed Tats??? it just reminded me....lol...."Born and raised"...lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kens Colors Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 I can't tell for sure were you complaining about being from here? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DuneJNKY Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 You forgot the State Bird........ The Crane Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vegas FX400 Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 Sad that most of those fit Why you Gotta Knock on the Vegas Themed Tats??? exactly.............thats what my next one is, gettin it in few weeks or sooner Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DuneJNKY Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 exactly.............thats what my next one is, gettin it in few weeks or sooner It's a nice thing to have. You know just in case you get lost Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barefoot bob Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 (edited) wierdos Edited November 20, 2007 by barefoot bob Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vegas FX400 Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 thats cuz we're from vegas..............oh i mean , born and raised....... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desertskyz Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 I'm sure by now that this could be updated. But it is still goo 1. First, it's pronounced LOSS-VAYGUS. It doesn't matter how they say it in other places. 2. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Las Vegas has its own set of traffic rules. There's no book about them. All you can do is get in your car and hope you survive to learn them. 3. All directions start with, "Go down 95 'cause you don't want to get on 15." 4. Las Vegas Blvd, Charleston Blvd, and Torrey Pines have no beginning and no end. 5. It's impossible to go around a block and wind up on the same street that you started on. The Chamber of Commerce calls this a "scenic drive." 6. The 8:00 am rush hour is from 4:30am to 11:30am. The 5:00pm rush hour is from 11:30am to 10:15pm. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning and ends sometime late Sunday night. 7. If you actually stop at a yellow light, then you cannot be from Las Vegas. You may only apply your brakes when the end of a yellow light and the beginning of the red light create a "pumpkin-orange" hue. 8. If you like being an individual, don't even think of working for a casino. You'll be branded like cattle and made to walk all over town with your "Gaming Tag" around the collar of your white shirt or clipped on to your belt loop of your black tuxedo pants. 98% of the people within a 200 mile radius work for a casino. When someone says "Steve Wynn," casino employees are trained to face the Strip, hit their knees, kneel, and say "Praise Steve" three times. 9. Just remember that Camino Al Norte is Martin Luther King Blvd; Boulder Highway is Fremont Street; Eastern Ave is 25th Street or Civic Center Drive; Spring Mountain/Sands/Twain are all the same street. Don't try to figure it out. Just accept it. If you question the intelligence behind this naming convention, people will simply tilt their heads to the right and stare at you. 9A. Henderson is the only place in the world where THREE "parallel" streets intersect at one traffic light. That would be the 4-way of Green Valley Parkway/Eastern Avenue/Maryland Parkway. For laughs ask your middle school geometry teacher to try to explain it. 9B. Rainbow Blvd. has THREE exits from the 95. This just makes giving driving directions to newbies more entertaining. There is also a Lake Mead "Drive" and a Lake Mead "Boulevard" that both run east/west but are 30 miles apart. You have to be specific when you say "the corner of Lake Mead and . ." Again, this is just another way to harass the 5000 newcomers every month. 9C. Many major roads just end abruptly at a house/Home Depot/Casino/McCarran International Airport Runway and start again after the interruption. That was done to encourage you to "see the sights" and meet new people. Just try to take Harmon Avenue from Rainbow to Nellis. 10. If moisture is determined to be rain, not sweat, all traffic must immediately cease. Ditto for daylight savings time, girl applying eye-shadow across the street, or a flat tire 3 lanes over. Do not attempt to access any road after an apocalyptic event like snow, blowing dust, or a 3-day weekend. 11. Construction on I-15 and US 95 is a way of life and a permanent form of entertainment. I-215 will never be completed. Get used to it! 12. Stay away from the corner of Nellis and Las Vegas Blvd if you do not like the thought of being in a remake of the movie "Top Gun." 13. And, yes, we all know that's a man in a teddy and a tiara on Fremont Street. His name is Leslie and he probably makes more money than you do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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